Shhhhhh... She's Sleeping

When you have limited gaming time like myself, you need to seize every possible opportunity to get your game on. That’s why when my lovely wife falls asleep while watching the last episode of Caprica for the 8^th time, I plays me some vids.

For all those gamers with slightly narcoleptic significant others, I thought I’d compile a list of do’s and don’ts to help you get the most out of your late night ‘Shhhh Gaming.’ And yes, I’m pretty sure I just coined that term. Remember, the goal here is to leave Sleeping Beauty undisturbed, so she can have a peaceful rest while you maximize your play time.

Do’s:

Keep the Volume Low: This ones a no brainer. The lower the volume the less likely she is to wake up. It's important to choose games that can be enjoyed in this state. I recommend Prince of Persia (2008). The sweet platforming action lets the visuals do the work, and the soundtrack is filled with gentle nature sounds like birds chirping.

Consistent Soundtrack: You want to avoid games that have quiet moments followed by loud explosions. Littlebigplanet (2008) is a perfect example. The music and sound effects are generally nonabrasive throughout the whole game.

Low Frustration Level: The last thing you want to do is break into a cursing fit during Shhhh Gaming. Take it easy and choose a game that wont make you mad… like Assassin's Creed II (2009). This game is rarely overly difficult or cheap. Whenever I died, all I wanted to do was give it another go.

Don’ts:

Shooters: Forget about it and save these for another time. Nothing will wake her up faster than gunfights and modern warfare explosions. Call of Duty is not welcome during Shhhhh Gaming hours.

Online Multi-Player Chat: Don’t be stupid!

Subwoofers: Nothing is better than hearing Kratos’ growl with the woofer on bust, but there’s a time and a place, and this isn’t it. If you’re an audiophile, consider optimizing your surround sound settings.

I hope this helps… and if all else fails, get yourself some headphones.

My Bloody Challenge No. 1

It recently occurred to me that I now have 7 Grand Theft Auto games in my possession and am ashamed to say that I haven’t finished a single one of them. In fact, I’ve only completed one in my lifetime, and that was Vice City back in 2003. Something is definitely wrong here. Why have I continued to buy these games over the past 7 years if I don’t bother to put the time in to finish them? Am I quitter, or is there something about the GTA games that consistently turn me off halfway through? With this challenge, I will attempt to take the former out of the equation.

You, my nonexistent readers, are now all my witnesses. I Carcus hereby challenge myself to finish every remaining GTA game that my current hardware will allow. Here is the list for greater clarification:

Grand Theft Auto (mac)
Grand Theft Auto 2 (?)
Grand Theft Auto III (PS2)
Grand Theft Auto San Andreas (PS2)
Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories (PSP)
Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories (PSP)
Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars (PSP)
Grand Theft Auto IV (PS3)
Grand Theft Auto: Episodes from Liberty City (PS3)

I have to admit, a little vomit just found its way into my mouth. The thought of having to complete 190 missions in San Andreas makes me want to delete everything I just wrote. This is indeed a huge undertaking and not one that I except to realize any time soon. This may take years, but I will do it. Expect frequent updates.

I think I need to lie down now…

Pit of Dispair

I would like to dedicate this blog to my buddy Bev. (I was recently informed that he is now my blogging boyfriend btw) Bev started his own blog a month or so back to help pull himself out of something that could only be described as a pit of despair. Don't pity him too much though. This despair was the result of his own doing. He spent several weeks grinding his PS3 and gathered every ounce of his precious spare time to realize one single goal. Mr. B wanted nothing more than to beat my PSN trophy count. After countless hours of 'Poop Sockin' It,' he finally pulled it off. Over the moon with excitement, he took pictures and even wrote a song about the achievement, but this joy quickly faded. It seemed for Bev, the means did not justify the end. All he did was create tangible proof that he was a bigger gaming nerd than yours truly.

During this awakening of sorts, he quickly realized that our hobby of video gaming is indeed a fruitless one. Without something to show for the countless hours he spent hunched over with controller in hand, gaming became kinda meaningless and more like a waste of time. This is when Mr. B decided to redirect some of his energy and started his blog. It was important for him to have a hobby with a product. He still loves the video games, but not as often.

For me, I never felt this video game despair. How one person chooses to spend his spare time is just at meaningful as the next. We’re all pushing that boulder up the hill.

So why am I starting my own blog? Unfortunately, my reasoning isn’t as dramatic or inspired as Mr. B’s. I just want to write about video games. Now that I think about it, this blog will be a bigger waste of time than trophy hunting since I’ll likely have more PSN friends than readers.